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The Aperture Science Switzerland-Based Portal Device

September 10, 2008

So the Hadron Collider may destroy mankind by sucking us all into a black hole. Or it may open a rift to another world and bring about an alien invasion. But how are we forgetting the most obvious Valve reference of all?


Think harder.

<GlaDOS> Now you’re thinking with Portals. </GlaDOS>

The possibilities would be endless if this is what they discovered. Running from the cops? NO PROBLEM! Just use your handy <GlaDOS> Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device </GlaDOS> to shoot a portal far, far away and then make sure you reshoot the first portal somewhere else or you’re screwed. Or maybe you need to travel back and forth somewhere, like school in my case, and you don’t want to have to deal with flights every three to six months. Shoot a Portal in your bedroom and one in your dorm room so you never have to ship anything and you can always sleep in your own bed. Or if you find a little turret is trying to shoot you, fire one portal in the ground under him and one on the side of a building so he can fall down and go “I don’t hate you!”

So, yeah, fingers crossed for Portals.


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One Comment
  1. Two words:

    Terminal Velocity.

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